long time writer...first time blogger

One thing about me is that I love to write. At the suggestion of a friend, I am taking up blogging to not only help heal myself, but maybe help someone else along the way.

About eight years ago I was diagnosed with bipolar after a few years of struggling to self medicate my way back to a normal life.  You see, my husband and I had struggled for a long time to have children and finally we were pregnant with a baby girl. She was born in Oct. of 2003 at 16 weeks and never took a breath in this world. I struggled for years with mental illness before that and somehow managed to hide it really well.  In fact, the only person that ever realized something wasn't quite right was my husband.  He has been a Godly beacon in my life for almost 15 years now and I will talk more about him later. Once we lost Kaitlyn I sank deeper into an abyss and what was probably all too soon, became pregnant with our son.  He's autistic and is almost 10 years old. I can't believe time has moved along so fast. After he was born, and I knew it wasn't simply the "baby blues" hanging around, I realized I needed professional help.  With a diagnosis finally came treatment and learning to live in a way that I never knew was possible.  Living in a happy place with my family is something I never knew growing up, but with the help of God, my husband and the right medication we are creating that safe and happy place for our son.

Forward on to the end of last year and I had a laparoscopy because of some endometriosis. In the months that followed the procedure I still experienced a lot of pain and seem to not be able to find a solution.  So, I went for a second opinion and am now in treatment with Lupron injections. I had my first injection last week and some days are better than others.  The fun part (insert sarcasm here) of Lupron is that it throws you into medical menopause.  I'm actually doing well with the mood swings.  Maybe it's the mood stabilizers from my bipolar. ha... The hot flashes and night sweats are not too bad.  I've had a couple hot flashes, but nothing unbearable.  I do take hormone medication along with vitamins and a phytoprolief cream and all that together seems to keep the night sweats and hot flashes to a minimum thus far.

I'm also a yogi wannabe.  I love the practice and it helps center my mind and balance my body when I feel well enough to go to class.

Life is hard, but we love it and make the most of our days.  We laugh as often as we can and love with all we have. So, together my husband, my son and I are taking on bipolar and menopause at 37. And on the days I don't feel like fighting, my two warriors step up and get us all three through another day!